Yep it's been almost one whole year!!! Wow wow wow how time is just slipping by me. So I had to sit down and write today. Why today out of any other day? Well because I just have some many emotions inside of me I have to just get them out.
First - I am about to remarry again. SCARY!!! Oh goodness please please let me have the strength to do this. I love him He is amazing to me for me and with me. I can't even get it out in words how much Kevin has made my life, better, easier, harder, funnier, happier, sweeter. I am really blessed to have him in my life. But it's still scary. The past is scary, the past can sometimes hinder you at times, the past can help you, the past can stop you dead in your tracks. Oh how I hate and love the past all at the same time. I know I have learned so much and I see how much I have grown please give me the strength to love and endure.
Second - for some reason the past couple of months I have come across some new and amazing women. We moved to a new house 6 months ago. I have yet to find that BEST FRIEND neighbor that I had in South Jordan (Surgey :)) But I have made friends. Ones that have helped in so many ways that they will even know. One in particular has just really helped me with getting Emma everywhere and is also Laurens Activity days leader and Lauren just loves her!!! I also met a mom through cheer and come to find out we have lived the same life pretty much. Same story and it was so nice and so welcoming to find someone who really understands what I went through. To know that someone felt my pain and really gets it. We shared so much in just the 3 hours we sat down and talked but I feel like I have known her for years. I am so excited to see her more often and to able to learn and grow from her. Then there is my cute photographer lady. Oh goodness what an amazing women. Again shared the same past and struggles. And I just love her. I sat in her basement for about an hour and half just talking like we were the best of friends and that we had known each other for years. It was after talking to her that something deep inside me was stirred.
I miss just experiencing life. I want to take in every moment and not forget. I want to see the good in everything instead of wondering if I will effect me negatively.
So as I get married on Friday I am just going to enjoy the moment and savor it. It's a beautiful thing that is happening. Kevin and I are becoming man and women. This is what deep down I have ignored. I am so happy to be become Mrs. Jeffery on 11/11/11. So as I embark on this jorney in life I pray that I will savor the moment and just love him. Love everything about him. I'm one lucky girl :)
